Since I was 13 years old, I’ve been hanging with the same group of friends from Long Island. Of course, living in the Midwest for 25 years, Funk had only met them sporadically, and he didn’t meet everyone until we moved back to the East Coast in 2011.

This past Memorial Day we had a party at our beach place, where Funk met my 2nd boyfriend for the first time. And by boyfriend I mean, I dated the kid for a month when I was 13. Hey, don’t make fun! When you meet your husband 60 days into your 19th year on earth, you remember the boys that came before him.

Anyway, this is how that meeting went.

The doorbell rings and Funk answers, recognizing Bryan immediately.

Funk’s first words to him are, “I hear you kissed my wife.”

Bryan responds, “Damn right I did.” And unperturbed, waltzes right past my husband of almost 40 years and says hello to the rest of the Ceil Place Gang.

Later, Funk notices that Bryan is uncomfortable. So, he gives him one of his flannel shirts to wear, because Bryan lives in Florida now, and it happened to be as cold as my mother’s personality that day.

For as long as I’ve known Funk, NOTHING has ever made my man jealous. A very annoying situation for an Italian-bred wife.

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